Monday, February 26, 2007

Fighting boredom when I have nothing to do ...

Sometimes life becomes so boring, especially when we have nothing to do, when sleep eludes us, we don’t want to touch any pending work, when we are already suffering from an overdose of movies , when there is no one around to have a bakar and when we do all kinds of crazy/ weird stuff to keep ourselves occupied. Some of the things which I have been doing of late are listed. It is as boring as it gets, and this list is by no means exhaustive:

  • · Searching Wikipedia for information on millions of things ranging from Mahabharata, Ramayana, and Gods to Chinese cuisine to Statistics of religions in USA to tea gardens blah blah.
  • · Changing my winamp playlist and then deleting most of the added songs.
  • · Searching for useless movie related trivia in some unknown movie.
  • · Calculating for the nth time the marks I shall need to pass the financial management course.
  • · Downloading files from LAN and deleting 97.73% of them, and meanwhile transferring files and folders from one drive to another for no reason.
  • · Boring my friends with some mundane chatting with every fourth line being aur sunaao or what’ s up (aur sunaao syndrome).
  • · Changing my gtalk status message and/ or picture once in every few minutes.
  • · Looking at the mess I have created in my room and then deciding against cleaning it believing that such a mess-creation is work of a genius
  • · Searching blogs by clicking on next at the top of the blog page, of which 50% blogs are in some foreign language, 49% in known language but indecipherable content, and 1% with readable/ decipherable content.
  • · Clicking on refresh button of my orkut home page @ 32 times/ hour and logging off and logging in every few minutes.
  • · Opening 3-4 different news sites in parallel and refreshing it with a speed matching my orkut refresh speed, and leaving most of the articles unread.
  • · Postponing reading of editorial and most of the non-trivial items to next day (which never comes!).
  • · Nibbling cashew nuts/ sweets/ eatables lying on my desk non-stop, ignoring all the signs given by my jeans which no longer fits me.
  • · Counting the number of hairs on my head that have turned white.
  • · Just blankly staring at things trying to think nothing
  • · Perfecting the art of criticism by criticizing most of the things that come my way.
  • · Thinking repeatedly that I need to do something productive and not waste time as I usually end up doing, often guided by my new year resolutions which are just lying there like government files and without any concrete action.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

I wish ...

I wish to go back to days when I used to rush back from school eager to tell my mother about the trivialest incident in school.

When I used to bombard my dad with millions of when/ where/ how/ why/ whom questions.

When I used to cry in school because my shoelace was open.

When I used to collect as many unripe mangoes from the tree.

When I used to fight with friends after my batting was over, in a hope to get it once again.

When I used to flaunt my toys to my friends, and feel jealous of theirs.

When I used to feel euphoric after winning a balloon game.

When I longed for the moment when I’ll get an ice cream.

When I feared that drinking tea will change the color of skin to black.

When I used to wait for the recess bell to ring for the Tiffin break, and rush to play ‘lock and key’.

When I used to fight with my brother for that slightly larger piece of cake.

When I used to shake my teeth anticipating when it will break.

When I used to feel proud of knowing alphabets till ‘k’ and numbers till ‘10’, and used to tell them in front of everyone.

When I used to snuggle to some inconceivable place in the game of hide and seek.

When my spirits were lifted on seeing humpty dumpty fall.

When I used to feel sad about doing a half mark question wrong in the examination.

When I wished I had supernatural powers to wipe away all the evils.

When I used to dream about many things which I would do when I shall grow up.

Now I long for none, but still wish to long for them.

Kalti

The train was about to leave.
I stared in the berth opposite to mine. There was a small kid of maybe 9-10 monthes, her cheeks slightly reddish, and he was wrapped in a pink woolen cloth. Maybe it would be apt to call her "gulabi golu".
Accompanying her was her mother, a young lady in her 20s, maybe around halfway through, and her "mausi" (mother's sister), who might have been a year or two younger.
The kid was cute, and it was no surprise that the ones accompanying the kid were beautiful.
In no time I found myself playing with the kid.
And meanwhile, I was having glimpses of her mausi and mother.
It was probably the first occasion when there was some good looking lady near my seat in a journey. I thought this and smiled, though no one except me was aware why.
and, then suddenly, the kids mausi talked to me, "BHAIYA, aap kidhar jaa rahe ho ?"
"Kalti !", i thought to myself ...and continued my journey

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Fate ?

/*Too philoshophical stuff...*/


Every time I see around me, I see faces full of worry, a face that is sad, a face that angry, a face that is irritated, a face that is worried. Behind the face that smiles often hides something which is not so apparent. Behind the smiling fa├žade are multitudes of layers of worries, fear or anguish. Many of these worried faces are the ones that rue upon wasted chances, or things not going their way, or things which were never under their control, or things that could have been. People do all kinds of things for it – from cribbing endlessly to desperately seeking divine help for a due/ undue favors to indulging in millions of ifs and buts, while many find solace in fact that it was ‘willed’, and they are not in control of whatever happens to them. Though resigned to fate, yet they are still worried about them.


But that’s life. Life is not always fair. Not everyone gets what he wants. If everyone gets what he wants, the only thing that will have any control over things is chaos, as most of us wish to have most of the things. There are things over which we can’t have control, but there are many others which we can make happen. We often fail to recognize them and wait for things to happen. And then whatever happens is nothing but fate, because in the battle between fate and us, we allow fate to get an upper hand. And when this happens, we lose control of our lives. But there are few, who fight this fate tooth and nail, and they are often the ones who make the difference. It is our call which group we want to belong to, and what kind of impact we want to leave.