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The man who didn't want his son to join IIT

He glanced at me with a kind of devilish look and an evil smile. His looks reminded me of someone. I couldn't recollect. After few minutes it was a kind of eureka moment when I thought - Doesn't he look like that famous villain in Hindi movies ?

After initial formalities we headed for the market to sell all the usual stuff my company produced. This was a routine job, at least during my training period. Few hours in the market in a relatively humid day at a small town in Rajasthan called Pali left us tired. It was the time to unwind with some tea and non-business gupshup.

During the course of discussion, I came to know that his son (Let us call him Akash) got some 93 percent marks in SSC in CBSE board. He wanted to go to IIT and for that he needed to go to Kota for preparations. But that man was not keen on him leaving the town. He was of the opinion that he would not come back to Pali as he would have to go to Bangalore for job as most of them did. Hence he had decided his son should do CA. But his son had taken science.

Meanwhile, the local Sales Officer, under whom I was getting trained came in. After usual stuff like market report we decided to take a 15 minute beer break and have a brief chit chat meanwhile. Invariably, the topic veered around the distributor and his son. I learned that Akash's mother had called him few times so that his dad could be convinced that he goes and prepared for IIT, but he was reluctant. In fact Akash was so brilliant that he had secured first rank in Rajasthan for admission to Bansal Coaching Classes at Kota. But his dad had not allowed him to go. Even repeated calls from the institute did not help. Later on his mother's attempt at trying to convince were greeted by threats of a talaaq. His neighbors tried to convince him but in vain. his brother tried to convince him but soon they both stopped talking. At back of his mind was that his brother in law had gone to USA and if Akash does so, he too will go away sooner or later. Hence he had decided that he would not let Akash go away.

Meanwhile, we returned back to the shop where his son had also come. Apparently he wanted to buy a lab coat for chemistry practicals that were needed for tomorrows classes. His father refused and gave him some other work. He went to do that, reluctantly and his suffocation was written all over the face.

The officer accompanying me started talking about general stuff and the conversation veered to career guidance kind of stuff. Being an engineer and an MBA, I was trying to give him some gyaan on opportunities available closer home. I mentioned about job opportunities in Delhi and Mumbai which were an overnight journey from that place and much closer if we considered the Jodhpur airport which wasn't too far away. Closer home, it would have been Jaipur or Ahmedabad, which were expected to give good opportunities, although deep inside me I was feeling that that useless idiot cannot think of his own child's well being. This was followed by a long monologue on software industry, what it does, how it will grow, why it is not just Bangalore and all. When it was not yielding any result I showed optimism in software industry setting footprints in Rajasthan as government will sooner or later realize the importance of it. So maybe two or three years down the line we could expect something in this direction.

But that man remained adamant and refused to budge from his position. Even an attempt to show that there was hardly any scope in some godforsaken place like Pali was met with jeers

I was thinking that isn't it often that the so called extremely selfless thing like parenting becomes a selfish thing and despite having good intentions, often much harm is done. At one level that man, I thought treated the whole thing as a business and something that should give an high ROI. He was instrumental. Expecting is not a bad thing, but often that expectation turns into a favor which need to be returned, and as a result of which the happiness of the person may be screwed, and he often becomes just a slave of that 'gratitude'. I thing that the whole thing is like the movie The Truman Show, where the creator of the 'Show' believed that he gave Truman who an unwanted baby, a life and he had a right to shoot a 24 hour long TV show on his life, with his unaware of the fact that every motion of him was captured on camera and telecast live throughout the world. And this, the creator believed was nothing against individual freedom or human rights or anything.

Meanwhile, it was getting late and it was time to catch my bus. I left after a good bye and a handshake, but his devilish glance was as it was few hours ago, but now I perceived to be much more devilish.

___

(Above is a true incident that I experienced today)

Comments

  1. Don't know, what to say!
    Sad...really...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Does he not realise that one day his son would hate him for it....he would say 'if not for my father,.....'?!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yeah ... Some people usually have a fixed line of thought, and no amount of logic or pestering or anything can make them budge I think! He seemed to be one of those guys. Sad, but true. Such people do exist!

    ReplyDelete
  4. omg...!!!
    that was reallly cruel...

    ReplyDelete

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